name that tune . . . er . . . baby

We're down to the wire now, folks. Speaking of "The Wire," why is there such a long wait for Season One of the show on Netflix?! And what about Season Three of Battlestar Gallactica due in March?! (interro-gotta-watch-all-I-can-before-baby-x-arrives!). But I digress. We're looking at lift-off in t-minus 24 days or so. We've got a girl's first name and a backup boy's first name, but leaving TP in charge of the middle name (if any) has resulted in an exercise in ridiculousness and futility. Aziza Baziza does not have "a nice ring to it." Nor does Aziza Norbu J. Kittycat. I was thinking that with an exotic first name, we'd give her a neutral easy-to-pronounce middle name that she can choose to go by when the dreaded teenage years hit and/or please the in-laws. On the other hand, once I learned that being different kinda rules, I quite enjoyed having a difficult name. Thus far, the following has been under discussion:

• Farah (voted by OS but some close friends just snatched that, so that's out).
• Delisha (only put in the running to see if anyone was paying attention but it actually is a muslim name meaning "happy and make others happy")
• Maria (vetoed by Literaunty b/c she had a good point that two names ending in 'a' might be a bit odd)
• Sara(h) (voted by TP in a rare moment of seriousness but see above)
• Maryam (voted by maryam, surprise surprise)
• Noor (personal favorite but we know too many noors already and doesn't solve the neutral issue)
• Yasmine/Yasmeen (again, lovely name but so many friends and family have already laid claim to that moniker)
• Rani (but more of a term of endearment apparently)
  

So what say ye? Any suggestions or advice? Who knows, you may win a chance to lay claim to naming our child!

vomitrocious

Lesson, the First:

Energy-draining pregnancy
+
Stomach-draining flu
____________________
One unhappy Baji

Here endeth the lesson.

go shoebox, it's yo birthday

My house turns 100 years old this year. Happy Birthday, housey! You don't look a day over 95. Never mind those wrinkles in the wall caused by settling - it just makes you look more distinguished! Don't pay any attention to the creaky pine floors that attempt to bear the combined weight of my and Baby X as we roam around at 2 a.m. looking for food and entertainment. The plastic surgery you had done to your posterior takes years off of your looks (even if the insulation kinda sucks). And that partially walled up secret room we just discovered in the basement just screams adventure and mystery (but hopefully does not actually scream with the terror of countless dead bodies). Anyway, happy birthday!

Shiver Me Timbers

P I R A T E R I D D L E S F O R S O P H I S T I C A T E S .

BY KEVIN SHAY

- - - -

Q: What's a pirate's favorite aspect of computational linguistics?
A: PARRRsing sentences.

Q: Of which concept shared by Jungian psychology and Northrop Frye's literary theory are pirates especially fond?
A: ARRRchetype.

Q: Who's a pirate's favorite member of the creative team behind "32 Short Films About Glenn Gould"?
A: Don McKellARRR.

Q: Of all of Richard Harris's many achievements in the performing arts, which is a pirate's favorite?
A: "MacARRRthur PARRRk."

Q: What's a pirate's favorite alliance-creating diplomatic agreement from the Second World War?
A: The TripARRRtite Pact.

Q: Which ancient Greek lyric poet do pirates like the best?
A: PindARRR.

Q: If a pirate were to recite one of the Olympian odes by the aforementioned poet, which one would it be?
A: The XIth Nemean Ode, "To ARRRistagoras, the Prytanis of Tenedos, son of ARRRchesilaus."

Q: If that same pirate were then to recite a 20th-century poem about the nature of poetry, what would it be?
A: "ARRRs Poetica" by ARRRchibald MacLeish.

Q: What if he went on to recite a poem by Sir Walter Scott?
A: "LochinvARRR."

Q: Why does that pirate keep reciting poetry, anyway? Is he some sort of Nancy-boy?
A: Aye, 'tis a Nancy-boy he be. Arrr.

Q: Of the ghosts that appear to Ebenezer Scrooge in "A Christmas Carol," which do pirates prefer?
A: Jacob MARRRley.

Q: Can we replace that last one with something about Bob Marley, so we can have an additional gag about RastafARRRianism?
A: No.

Q: Whom did the pirate vote for in the Haitian election?
A: ARRRistide.

Q: Wait. Why did they let a pirate vote in the Haitian election?
A: Remember, the nation was taking its first halting steps toward democracy, and balloting procedures were rather chaotic. The pirate just slipped in somehow. Arrr.

Q: I don't buy it. Pirates care nothing for participating in the electoral process.
A: Look, can we finish this up soon? I'm having those phantom pains in my wooden leg.

Q: A phenomenon first described in the 17th century by which important contributor to the field of amputation surgery?
A: Oh, this is getting ridiculous.

Q: Just say it.
A: Ambroise PARRRé.

Q: You can go now.
A: Arrr. Nancy-boy.