Day Five: Not much. Honestly. Breakfast, beach, and bird-watching (a cardinal came into our room at one point).

TP and I took a walk around the gardens in the afternoon. We came upon a coconut palm grove and found a coconut on the ground. Since we left our machete at home, TP went into total caveman mode as he tried to pry open the coconut, grunted meaninglessly, threw it violently against the tree, and dragged his knuckles along the ground before pounding it in frustration. We took the coconut for a walk. When we found a large chunk of lava rock near a cliff overlooking the ocean, TP seized the rock, heaved it high, and tried to bash the nut open. No luck. TP sulked and retired into a cave where he expressed his anger and confusion via artistic but simplistic cave drawings depicting the coconut as his friend and enemy.

That evening, we saw Neil Young dining at the table next to us, a traditional Hawaiian musical trio perform in the lobby, and an incredible expanse of the world-reknowned, clear, starry skies at night (Orion is still my favorite).

Next up: a drink that tastes like raw sewage with a hint of brimstone.